There are some things that go on the New Year's resolution list every year. This means, despite being on the resolution list for an entire year already, they still have not been accomplished. What are these universal desires people have, and why aren't they being met? Here are five goals most people never reach in life, but hope they do.
Having the perfect body
Losing weight is the number one goal of most Westerners, and it is easy to see that it isn't being reached. Weight loss products are some of the most successful products offered for sale, even though they often don't perform the way they claim they will. Why aren't people losing weight? Because they look at it as a process with a beginning and an end. If they do x, they'll reach y and they can go on with their lives. Losing weight or gaining muscle, or changing your appearance in any meaningful way takes a permanent change in lifestyle. Once a successful formula for change has been found, it has to be maintained forever in order to really achieve success. People are focusing on the end result: weight loss, instead of focusing on changing the underlying problem: self-discipline. This isn't to say that people are overweight because they are too lazy to stop eating; weight loss is infinitely more complex than that. It is important to note that the true change needs to happen within the mind before it can happen in the body. These inner changes include developing healthy habits, gaining self-confidence, and taking responsibility for what happens in your life.
Reaching their creative potential
Talent is common. Even great talent isn't unique. If talent is so common, why doesn't everyone reach their potential? Reaching one's potential takes much more than talent. Nearly everyone has an idea for a novel they want to write; nearly no one actually writes that novel. It takes perseverance, tenacity, confidence, humility, and the ability to try again to succeed and reach your potential. And, just like weight loss, it is something that never stops. A successful novelist doesn't rest once they have published their first novel. They continue with the dedication, passion, and confidence that got them that far. Because even the most successful people haven't yet reached their potential. Potential grows as you feed it with passion, practice, and devotion, and continues to do so until you die. Reaching your potential means devoting yourself to your craft and never, ever giving up.
Making enough money
How much money is "enough"? I bet you can remember a time when you made half as much money as you do now, when the amount you currently bring in seemed so enormous that you thought if only you could reach it, you could finally rest. So why is it still not enough? There are practical, logical reasons, of course, why your money doesn't add up like you thought it would. You've probably got a larger family or more responsibilities than you used to. The biggest reason people never reach that final threshold of having enough money is that they allow their lifestyles to expand in direct correlation to how much money they have. To allow the money you have to become enough, or even more than enough, you need to know what is truly important to you. Spend money on that, on your responsibilities, and nothing else. Being mindful and aware of where your money is going is the only way to finally feel like you have enough.
Finding Love
Experts estimate that 50% of people end up getting divorced and countless other people never even get married. Finding love and getting married is important to a lot of people, but yet so few people seem to reach this goal. Relationship building is hard an often time consuming. People get busy with work and distracted by technology and entertainment. Instead of going out to new places, people are also content with meeting up with the same friends. Also, people often accept their weaknesses rather than fight to improve themselves in ways that make them more attractive to the opposite gender. To improve the odds of finding the right person, commit time to improving yourself as well as trying different things to meet more people.
“Arriving”
Then, you might finally arrive. This is the nebulous sensation of having reached your desires. Everyone wants to feel like they've arrived, but the sensation is so vague, most people don't even know what that would look like. The secret to finally having your desires is not to achieve every point on your long list of goals. In fact, once you've achieved those goals, it is likely you will feel disappointed, because the feeling of success doesn't automatically come with concrete success. The only way to feel like you have everything you need is to be aware of each moment as it passes. Live every moment with the courage to face it honestly. Stop trying to change what you have. Accept life as it is. That is the secret to arriving. After that, the grass will never be greener anywhere else.
Having the perfect body
Losing weight is the number one goal of most Westerners, and it is easy to see that it isn't being reached. Weight loss products are some of the most successful products offered for sale, even though they often don't perform the way they claim they will. Why aren't people losing weight? Because they look at it as a process with a beginning and an end. If they do x, they'll reach y and they can go on with their lives. Losing weight or gaining muscle, or changing your appearance in any meaningful way takes a permanent change in lifestyle. Once a successful formula for change has been found, it has to be maintained forever in order to really achieve success. People are focusing on the end result: weight loss, instead of focusing on changing the underlying problem: self-discipline. This isn't to say that people are overweight because they are too lazy to stop eating; weight loss is infinitely more complex than that. It is important to note that the true change needs to happen within the mind before it can happen in the body. These inner changes include developing healthy habits, gaining self-confidence, and taking responsibility for what happens in your life.
Reaching their creative potential
Talent is common. Even great talent isn't unique. If talent is so common, why doesn't everyone reach their potential? Reaching one's potential takes much more than talent. Nearly everyone has an idea for a novel they want to write; nearly no one actually writes that novel. It takes perseverance, tenacity, confidence, humility, and the ability to try again to succeed and reach your potential. And, just like weight loss, it is something that never stops. A successful novelist doesn't rest once they have published their first novel. They continue with the dedication, passion, and confidence that got them that far. Because even the most successful people haven't yet reached their potential. Potential grows as you feed it with passion, practice, and devotion, and continues to do so until you die. Reaching your potential means devoting yourself to your craft and never, ever giving up.
Making enough money
How much money is "enough"? I bet you can remember a time when you made half as much money as you do now, when the amount you currently bring in seemed so enormous that you thought if only you could reach it, you could finally rest. So why is it still not enough? There are practical, logical reasons, of course, why your money doesn't add up like you thought it would. You've probably got a larger family or more responsibilities than you used to. The biggest reason people never reach that final threshold of having enough money is that they allow their lifestyles to expand in direct correlation to how much money they have. To allow the money you have to become enough, or even more than enough, you need to know what is truly important to you. Spend money on that, on your responsibilities, and nothing else. Being mindful and aware of where your money is going is the only way to finally feel like you have enough.
Finding Love
Experts estimate that 50% of people end up getting divorced and countless other people never even get married. Finding love and getting married is important to a lot of people, but yet so few people seem to reach this goal. Relationship building is hard an often time consuming. People get busy with work and distracted by technology and entertainment. Instead of going out to new places, people are also content with meeting up with the same friends. Also, people often accept their weaknesses rather than fight to improve themselves in ways that make them more attractive to the opposite gender. To improve the odds of finding the right person, commit time to improving yourself as well as trying different things to meet more people.
“Arriving”
Then, you might finally arrive. This is the nebulous sensation of having reached your desires. Everyone wants to feel like they've arrived, but the sensation is so vague, most people don't even know what that would look like. The secret to finally having your desires is not to achieve every point on your long list of goals. In fact, once you've achieved those goals, it is likely you will feel disappointed, because the feeling of success doesn't automatically come with concrete success. The only way to feel like you have everything you need is to be aware of each moment as it passes. Live every moment with the courage to face it honestly. Stop trying to change what you have. Accept life as it is. That is the secret to arriving. After that, the grass will never be greener anywhere else.
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